Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
