the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
