I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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