I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
