You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
