If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
You can't just leave with hair like that
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I just sucked dick on a ferry
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