Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
