I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Is it penis luge time yet?
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
i think we sleep fucked last night...
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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