I need to stop coming to work sober
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
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I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
