Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
