Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
