Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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