he wants to bone in the snuggie
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
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