Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
