The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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