yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
