maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize