We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
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