I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
