I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Randomize
