i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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