so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
