:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
