the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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