the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize