Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
