is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize