Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
