Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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