I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
