So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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