oh god the rape fog is back!
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
