i was rollin on her like bob the builder
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
