The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
