You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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