Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize