I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
