Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Still dying that you shit outside
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
