there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
