probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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