You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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