SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
