i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize
