i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
