Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
