But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
