What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
