I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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