Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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