How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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